Tag: awareness

Afternoon Delight

Posted on by cmryan

There was once a popular song entitled “Afternoon Delight.” While this writing is not about the lyrics of that song, recent activities have brought up for me the joy of living and the gratitude of being… which are best described by the word “delight.” Perhaps you can relate.

Things That Bring Me Delight

  • Recently I shared a swing set with one of my granddaughters. As we traveled back and forth in the wind, pushing our feet to and fro to go ever higher and higher, the little girl inside me was giddy with delight.  I remembered how much I always loved to swing.
  • Earlier in the week I completed the formatting for a new curriculum version of a class I just began teaching, and am thrilled with the depth and richness it offers my students.
  • Today, an old but working kitchen stove was picked up and taken away after sitting for days in the driveway with a “free” sign on it.
  • My almost-new dog is teaching me how she plays keep-away and tug-of-war with her toys. I got to buy new ones to replace the ones we’re wearing out.
  • I’m always ecstatic when I prepare my Sunday message or these blog writings and end up with more material than I need to use.
  • At bedtime I enjoy reading a book, checking up on my social media site to see what my “friends” are doing, then shutting off all the technology and cuddling up with my husband before dropping off to sleep. The routine makes me smile.
  • And on those mornings, when I get on the bathroom scale weighing slightly less than I did the day before, I’m very delighted with my progress.

Delight contains many aspects and emotions, but not necessarily all at the same time. Delight is joy and happiness… love… gratitude and appreciation… a now-moment experience… content­ment… peace… laughter. What I have found is that the more I recognize this feeling of delight, the more I find it. It shows up everywhere! It’s also very addicting.

I love this feeling of being so much in the “now” that life is totally fulfilling, no matter what is going on. By being so completely aware of what is happening right here, right now, my activity feels complete… as I’m experiencing it. There’s no concern about what’s going to happen next because this moment isn’t done yet. I’m not making any plans for the next project because I’m having fun with this one. And when other people are involved and we’re totally focused on whatever we’re doing, it deepens our relationship… creates a memory… strengthens our bond… and further clarifies our purpose in each other’s lives.

It’s a way to experience the full and loving presence of the Divine… live lightly… delightfully! Grab those moments; hold them for just a few seconds longer. Learn to really appreciate Life!

What brings you delight?

My name is…and I’m a…

Posted on by cmryan

What do an unkempt yard, garden tools, and a timer have in common? The answer… awareness and inspiration. My time pulling weeds and cleaning up garden debris has brought to the forefront of my awareness an obvious addiction I’ve had for years…perhaps my entire adult life. It’s one that is often welcomed in the professional arena. But before my friends and congregants get too concerned about my problem, let me declare it here and now: I’m a workaholic…on the path to recovery.

During the past two years, I’ve focused on two separate careers. Long hours and extensive commuting have been the priority, excluding me from any kind of real life. Now, having left the distant, full-time office job and turning full-time focus to ministry, teaching and writing while working from home, I’m discovering the challenges of creating my day’s schedule, learning to rest without becoming complacent or distracted (staying motivated), and quieting the voice in my head that constantly tells me I’m not doing enough.

Just recently, I literally forced myself to spend an afternoon on the couch, resting after a busy Sunday morning and watching television with my husband. There was work waiting at my desk (there always is) and projects were clearly visible around the house, in the yard, garage, and especially in my office. The whole time I was on the couch, that ugly voice was whispering how lazy I was….that I wasn’t really tired and didn’t need to sit there…that work – any work – was more important than television (no matter what was on)…that I’d pay for it later…and other things that were much more critical and hurtful. Ego will say whatever it can to keep things static, familiar. It was all I could do to force my restless body to stay seated in the recliner.

I have always known how to work. I learned it at an early age and have been rewarded for my efforts. It’s what I do best. Frankly, resting, taking breaks, or relaxing is where the difficulty lies. Take away my opportunity to work on a project, to solve a problem, to meet a deadline, and it’s like taking away the bottle from an alcoholic or drugs from an addict. In the past, given a choice to work or go to some social event, I’d gladly choose work (in my head). Most always I have two or three or more projects going at the same time. My brain never shuts off and is generally focused on work-related topics. I learned I could rest when the work is done, but it never is. I’d start a 12-Step group in my area, but taking on another task would only add to the problem. (Go to Workaholics-Anonymous.org for symptoms of this addiction.)

As I work on my landscape maintenance projects, something I absolutely love doing, it’s become critical for my health to pace myself. I use a timer…and the “power of an hour.” I give myself one hour each morning to play in the dirt – that’s it. Then I consciously talk myself into cleaning up, putting away the garden tools, bagging up the weeds and yard trash, before going on to the next task (it’s quite a conversation!)…where I set the timer again. If I don’t limit my time in this manner, I have been known to work myself into exhaustion – euphoric with what I’ve visibly accomplished, but unable to move a muscle from all the adrenal push and exhaustion. My body needs the physical exercise and movement, but I don’t need to work myself to death. Yes, it appears I’ve reached bottom.

My ego had been fairly quiet these past two years as I pushed myself through an insane schedule and rationalized it was something I had to do. Now, it’s shouting again. Making the choice to focus on one career and a personal life has not been an easy one for me. I’m seeing me in a glaring light of self-awareness. I’m noticing the difficulty in pacing myself through projects, finding balance on a daily basis, and committing to recovery from this obsessive, addictive behavior. I’ve even begun to set the timer for my rest periods or fun activities, too, so I know when I can get back to work. Baby steps…one day at a time.

I’m ready to enjoy life – every bit of it – family, friends, home, hobbies, fun and relation, time for me, and work – each in its own turn. I’m grateful for all the loving support in this recovery endeavor. It’ll be interest­ing to see who I become through the process. I could go on and on about this, but right now, I’m being called outside to give a six-year-old lessons in tree climbing. See you later.

AAA+

Posted on by cmryan

The title above is not an endorsement for a towing service or an insurance company. It stands today for “Awareness, Acknowledgment, Action. Appreciation.” It is my simple system of up-leveling life and staying in a positive frame of mind, no matter what is going on around you. This “triple-A+” approach is a quick reminder to me of how to stay centered in the affirmative and to keep growing consciously in life.

Awareness. If you don’t pay attention, you won’t know what’s wrong or right in your life and the world around you. Sometimes we need a “wake up call” or to “hit bottom” before our eyes are opened to reality – the “what is” of life without all our subconscious filters distorting the view. For example, we may become aware of a certain limitation (physical, mental, emotional, financial, etc.) that keeps us from pursuing some particular goal or dream. We can either accept that limitation and halt our plans or we can work on changing the limitation to a strength. Being aware is the first step.

Acknowledgment. This part of the formula requires that we are rigorously honest with ourselves. Frankly, if we can’t be truly honest with ourselves, how can we ever be honest with anyone else? I’ve been working on my knowledge and practices in regard to the way I handle my finances. Through my personal studies, I’ve learned that, for many adult years, I spent any extra cash (and often credit) in the same manner I learned in childhood. Only I can make the change and there’s no one else to blame for the financial position in which I place myself. I am responsible. Going along with my husband on a deal that doesn’t really feel good to me…or trying to convince him to agree with one of my unnecessary remodeling projects…involves taking a hard look at MY part in the process. There are always consequences – positive or negative – cause and effect – for every decision.

Action. Once I’m aware of my pursuit or challenge and acknowledge what part I play in the process, then it’s time to take action. This means I actually DO something about it! I don’t just sit back and complain how unfair life is or blame another because it’s not as easy as it “should be.” Stop “should-ing” on yourself. Making a “To Do” list, remodeling blueprint or financial plan is an action step. Saving 10 cents of every dollar for retire­ment is an action step. Weeding one section of the garden each day is an action step. Do what you can with what you have to work with. Procrastination gets you nowhere.

Appreciation.  Step back and appreciate how far you’ve come…this day, this week, this year or even this decade. My husband and I recently took a quick journey down memory lane and recapped what we’ve accomplished in the past 20 years of our lives. (We’ve been together 17 of them.) It was an amazing realization! If we do that much in the next 20 – holy moly! Actually, we’ll probably do more. Through this review, we came to appreciate each other and our individual selves for the personal growth and accomplishments we have each contributed to our marriage and partnership. The whole is so much greater than the parts, yet the parts are what make the whole!

The “AAA+” approach keeps me on-track toward creating a life I love and can share with others. Use this process, tweak it as you choose. The only way you can lose in the game of Life, is if you don’t play. Never quit! Don’t give up. Keep moving forward. If you’re breathing and thinking, then there’s something you can do. Keep growing.

Relationships

Posted on by cmryan

It doesn’t matter who you are, where you live, or the life you are creating…you will be in relationship with someone at sometime. Your very life began as a result of the physical relationship of your parents. The end of your life may include the care of those who are not your family. Yet the most important relationship to consider, which you will no doubt reflect upon during your final days if not before, is the one you have with yourself…your human personality or ego self with your spiritual or God-Self.

You are always the common denominator in any relationship of your life. Think about that? In fact, here are a few questions to consider:

  • If you are experiencing negativity or irritation or some other type of low-quality feeling with the majority of the people in your life, is it really them?
  • Would the people in your life be more welcome to you if ALL of them just changed?
  • Or is it your perspective and attitude that needs the adjustment?
  • What is the ‘quality’ of your relationships with others?
  • How do you view yourself?
  • Would you want YOU for a friend?

I am about to leave my place of employment where I’ve been for nearly two years. During this time, I’ve taken little initiative to get to know many of the people here. In fact, far more people know who I am than I do them. Our work tasks do not mingle, we’re on different floors, work different schedules, etc. It is what it is.

On the other hand, of those few people I do know and interact with regularly, the depth of most interactions has been very shallow. We’ve not gone out lunch together or shared a coffee break. Topics of conversation have centered on work or the company the majority of the time. This approach is partly due to the solitary environment in which I’ve been working, as well as my less-than-enthusiastic desire to be here. I am responsible for the way I isolated myself so as not to get too involved, which could have impacted my decision to leave or focus on a new career direction, but resolved an inner conflict I found easier to avoid than to face.

It is only now that, with the decision made to leave and my last day of working here clearly in view, I am taking the time to share of myself and they with me. Oh, what I have missed!  We have shed tears together, shared dreams, told stories, solved world problems, and laughed about so many things. Whether we continue our new, deeper relationships after my departure from this job remains to be seen.   

While I have some regret of not making this effort earlier in my tenure here, I have learned, again, a valuable lesson of living, connecting, and being present in the now moment of livingness…to recognize the preciousness of our earthly relationships and the value they offer to our spiritual consciousness. Whether it be for a moment in the check-out line, daily interaction with the people at work, or how you live with yourself from the inside-out, the quality of your relationships is up to you…and you alone.

 

Routine, Habit or Practice?

Posted on by cmryan

As much as I like to think of myself as a spontaneous, free-spirited person, it’s obvious that I am more prone to routine, habit and structure. It only took three days for my new dog to figure this out about my morning routine. Even then I was trying to vary the pattern so she wouldn’t catch on…to no avail. Her ability to know that I was going to work after achieving certain tasks, leaving her alone for the day, brought out an obstinacy and nervousness I didn’t know was possible in such a little dog. I admired her intelligence for picking up my habits so quickly. It caused me to wake up to and rethink what I was doing, and how I was going to ‘out smart’ this little four-legged teacher.

Routines or habits can be good. I find they make remembering things less stressful if I do certain tasks the same way every day, such as putting my keys in the same place so I can find them later. I’ve experienced trying to change this one habit in recent weeks with negative results. I put my work keys in a different spot than I usually do, forgot I had done so, and walked away. Later, when I realized they were not in-hand, I retraced my steps only to discover that someone else had picked them up and given them to a manager. Eventually I tracked them down and my key-carrying habit has been reinstated. Some habits aren’t worth changing. Others are.

When we employ routines that allow us to be the most efficient, the most productive, they often become a habit, until something new is introduced to the process – such as a small dog. Now, I’m more aware of the routine things I do in the morning. Since I want to ease the anxiety of this small critter (an adopted, rescue dog), but still get ready for the day, I mix up my tasks. Yes, doing so slows down my exit just a bit. However, knowing I leave her calm and peaceful, I feel better. I’m paying attention. I’m consciously aware that my actions are impacting another living creature and it is my responsibility to do no harm to the best of my ability. This takes practice.

Practice, in the generic definition, is to “repeat something to get better” or “an established way of doing something, especially one that has developed through experience and knowledge.” I see practice as being consciously aware of creating a new positive routine or habit based on experience and knowledge.

For example, when we begin a meditation practice, we are very aware of every sound in the room and the stream of thoughts that suddenly (or so it seems) flood our mind for attention.  It takes combining the knowledge of what meditation is – plus conscious awareness and concerted effort – to calm the mind, ignore the sounds, dismiss the thoughts for a time, and go deep into the peaceful place within to commune with Spirit. Repeat as often as possible until it becomes a positive routine and you become serene just preparing for the meditation. Who knows, after awhile, the peacefulness of the meditation practice could very well become your way of being, of living, of habit.

My intent is the same for my new companion – to create a space of peace and trust for her. It will take time for a new routine to form…and lots of practice.

Well Being

Posted on by cmryan

There is nothing like experiencing a health challenge, no matter how minor, to bring your focus of attention within. Within to the workings of your body. Within to your own consciousness about the experience and the duration. Within to pray that true healing is revealed, to pray for well being.

I like the term – well being – as a way to describe how I am and who I am. I am a well being. At the core of my body, my consciousness, my soul, I am well. I know in the deepest recesses of my mind that my circumstance is absolutely perfect – and that I’ll recognize how perfect it is at some point on this journey, sooner or later. A bit of physical discomfort cannot diminish the essence of me – a Spiritual expression in form…a being.

As I describe myself as “being,” it removes the worldly tags and labels so often associated with people in this life. Not a woman or man, professional or laborer, old or young…simply, a being. That word puts us all on an even keel, doesn’t it? And thinking of myself in this manner reaffirms the nature I wish to demonstrate: wellness, non-judging, balanced, open, and accepting. It declares that I AM, that my reason to exist is to express who I am – being me, with all my human characteristics, habits and uniqueness, is enough

Can you sense the difference and the potential it attracts? A Well Being vs. a woman with a nagging and minor health condition? When we think of ourselves as always well, we have the possibility of experiencing healing, positive results, recovery, and perfect health.

In the abundance of this great Universe, even the meaning of what constitutes “health” is variable beyond the space of these lines. So, too, does “wellness” expand the definition as it encompasses more than the physical, emotional, and spiritual. It includes all the Good of what we conceive Life to be and have within it. Thus, declaring to be a Well Being attracts to us all those possibilities we might neglect to list with our narrow minds.

Be open to attracting the unlimited possibilities of life and expressing as a Well Being. You are one with Life! Rejoice.

First Things First

Posted on by cmryan

The first days of a new year can stir up so much in one’s psyche. The excitement of something new or starting over or beginnings of various kinds can either bring a person’s mind into focus of what needs to be addressed – or – the excitement can be a distraction. Keeping “First Things First” at the forefront can help you sort out what needs to happen next.

I first started using this slogan as a calming method many years ago. I found myself getting overwhelmed with all my busyness and caretaking activities; things that often were not mine to do. I could waste valuable mental energy planning scenarios, making lists, and not really accomplishing what needed to be done in the moment. By repeating this slogan during times of stress or overwhelm, it helped me regain focus of what was really important to do, see or be in that moment. I could breathe easier, clear my head, and attend to my project or task with efficiency and successful completion. I still use this method today, although much more easily and quickly.

The difference I see now is the types of stirrings that require a “First Things First” practice. Where before my focus was on concerns and what needed to be done for others, now it’s keeping myself from taking on too much at once. As those who know me can attest, I have many interests and a lot of energy! When I get a new idea to pursue, addressing the daily tasks can be a challenge. Like a brand new toy at Christmas, I want to play with the latest gadgets, the new ideas…not the old stuff that’s been around forever.

Yet, it’s the old stuff that has brought me to this point and allows me to appreciate and recognize the new. Awareness grows. Life experiences build wisdom. Beliefs are refined. Knowledge is obtained. Thinking expands. Comfort is found. And another new idea blossoms to stir the excitement again.

I know what it looks like when a chicken is running around with no head. Being overwhelmed can be like that – or worse! There’s a rhythm to life; we know this.  “First Things First” helps keep me in Life’s pulse so I can express to my fullest. It’s my friendly reminder of how to stay in sync with the Universe so that as many as possible of my new ideas can be born in their right time…one year after the next.

Happy New Beginnings!

Driving or Driven?

Posted on by cmryan

There is that “thing” in us that pushes us to express life, ever fuller, ever richer. We call it Divine Inspiration, motivation, urge or drive. One name does not fit all, nor does one way apply to how every individual expresses, whether in their career, artistic expression, or even the way they drive a car. My daily commute averages 60-90 minutes each way and exposes me to thousands of drivers. I often wonder if the people “drive” their lives the same way they drive their cars.

My drive to and from work is very calculated and planned, so that I can arrive at my destination in the least amount of time and incident-free. I pay attention to the traffic patterns presented during my commute, the time of day, even the time of month or season; such factors affect the number of cars on the road and the types of drivers, too.

For example, in the morning I stay in the far left lane of the highway until I’m about a mile from my exit. It may not move any faster than the other three lanes, but it’s the most direct and has the least number of drivers coming in and out of it. I’m on a mission: get to work! Also, if I need to suddenly stop, the shoulder is just to the left and I can avoid any rear-end impacts to those in front or behind.

As for my return commute in the evening, the fastest and smoothest-running lane is the one just right of the far left lane. The cars move at a steady pace and the lane seems less congested than the ‘fast’ lane. Again, it usually has the least number of drivers coming in and out of it.

So how do these driving habits relate to the way I express in life? In my career? My hobbies or activities? Maybe you can relate to these comparisons:

  • Have a plan, route or map to the destination. I’ve thought through as much as I can based on present observations and past experiences.
  • Use a signal or directional when making lane changes. I talk about it when I need to make a change in life, too. Admittedly, I’m not the most spontaneous person I know… and certainly not for those things in life that hold significant consequences. Go to a movie at a moment’s notice? Yes. Quit my job without having another lined up? Not any more.
  • Obey all traffic laws and the Laws of the Universe, even when no one is looking. I let people into my lane when they signal such an intention, and if someone wants to pass me in a hurry, I let them go by–and pray for their safety. The Universe keeps perfect score ALL the time, and I want my scorecard balanced and clean.
  • Buckle the seat belt every time I’m in a car and maintain my vehicle regularly. This relates to doing what’s healthy and wise for my body, mind and soul, being proactive in caring for this physical form that carries me through life, slowing down when things get too chaotic, maybe even pulling over or taking a break.
  • Stay aware. I notice when traffic or weather patterns change and I need to adapt. I watch for and avoid careless drivers. Learn and apply new skills. Take a different route or get out of the familiar lane. Sometimes it’s necessary to leave familiar patterns…to experience a new situation. 

That’s how we continue to grow and more fully express life.  LIFE: the gift that keeps on giving!

Our Most Precious Gift

Posted on by cmryan

In days of gift-giving, whatever time of year, it is wise to pause on the weight of our decision. What do we really want to give to those we love? How much focus do we place on the cost or size of our gifts to others? What is the most precious gift?

I’ve often thought the answer was time. If I only had more time, I could do… be… whatever. That is linear thinking, isn’t it? All we truly have is the present moment. Right here. Right now. When we’re conscious about this fact, we can make better use of our time. We can choose to do what is the most important to us in that moment, while simultaneously considering how our actions and thoughts of today will create our tomorrows, for they will. The gift of time can, indeed, impact how we live our life, but is it the most precious?

What about love? Love is indeed precious. Through centuries of Bible verses we have been told that “God so loved the world…” [John 3:16]. In this one verse it states that we are loved so much that God gave something valuable to us so we would have something even more priceless in return. Logically, one could believe that, while love is indeed a precious gift, apparently it is only an avenue to an even greater one.

Still, in the physical world where we live, move and have our being, we are encouraged to…“Write that letter. Make that call. Go see that person. Give that gift. Say that thank you. Grab that time together. Show them you love them now.” [from gospel.com] We find human and spiritual connection through loving acts. We feel good relating in positive ways with those we feel close to. What could possibly be more precious than love?

The answer can be found in many places, one of which is again the Bible [Romans 6:23]: “…the gift of God is eternal life…” Think about that for a moment: eternal life. Naturally, we’re not talking about this physical body existing indefinitely. In fact, we’re not even sure our consciousness remains the same, no matter how enlightened we may be. We’re talking about Life…the unseen force that breathes us…the invisible energy that inspires and creates through us…the Divine Power that exists in and as us.

We – as living expressions of God – with body, mind and eternal soul energy (Life) are the most precious gift! Imagine that! Dr. Ernest Holmes once said: “You and I are born out of God, and we are born out of a divine urge that creates. ” He also stated that “…Life is a blessing or a curse, according to the use we make of it.” Life IS precious!

So what use are you making of the life you have? Yes, your place in the material world can be important. But ask the even greater question: what are you doing as a soul-filled creation? Do you spend your time in ways that inspire the Life in you or others? Do you love the world so much that all bias and judgment are gone? Are you expressing in such a way that your soul, your Life force, is a gift of God? What about being a gift TO God in return?

Now there’s something to think about. Maybe God could use a nice present this year, too. Consider this affirmation as a starting point:

I express and honor this precious gift of Life as a loving gift of God.

 

Open at the Top

Posted on by cmryan

On a recent trip the airline flights were peppered with a variety of weather patterns. The conditions ranged from sunny to snowfall, with spatters of clouds, cold, wind, fog, and rain between. Shelter was readily available. No accidents occurred; only delays…and surprises.

The best surprise arrived during a flight heading north, away from grey fog, cold rain, and gusty winds. The plane climbed in altitude. It arrived in a clear and sunlit world above a puffy land of white clouds, blue sky, and blinding sunshine. I felt my body offer a joyful breath of relief as the plane travelled most of its journey in this bright heaven. I also noticed how my mind relaxed. My initial thought was, “This is what it means to rise above conditions and be ‘open at the top.’ ” Here is how the world and our challenges look when we take them to prayer.

As we connect with Divine Mind and move into Higher Consciousness, a more expansive perspective is possible. We can make this shift in perception through meditation, art, singing or just staring out the window of an airplane miles above the earth. While the details of life need to be addressed in this worldly existence where we live, move, and express our being, the importance of the minutia needn’t consume our every thought. Actually, the more often you visit this elevated viewpoint, the less impact the details may have on your psyche. You may find yourself willing to release control on tightly-gripped projects, allow trusted others to make decisions on your behalf, or just go along with the flow of life.

An “open at the top” mindset allows you to express your individuality and for others to express theirs; for all to accept and allow. It provides you with a new avenue of information to enhance your thinking. Such an experience gives you the opportunity to live an expanded life, in physical expression as well as in consciousness.  You can find serenity in the midst of a crowded airplane during a turbulent flight. You can experience peace within while a family gathering is displaying chaos and confusion around you. In fact, you may find such bliss in prayer that all other experiences so pale in comparison you won’t want your prayer time to end! It doesn’t need to.

Every thought is a prayer. Every loving act of life an expression of God’s presence. Every idea an inspiration of Spirit. Unless you are paying attention, unless you are open to even the most common of experiences, you might miss the messages of that still small voice…

Be open. Be inspired. Be surprised!