Category: Prof-Career-Writing

Deciding Long-Term

Posted on by cmryan

Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever get ‘it’ all down…how to live this thing called Life successfully enough that I don’t need to have so many do-over’s or RE-awakenings. Like making decisions. I make several a day: what to eat or wear; which project to work on first; scheduling appointments, what music or movie to enjoy, etc. I’m grateful that I get to choose such things for my life. These types of decisions don’t have major significant consequences, but there are others that do…others that have long-term effects.

What I’ve been RE-awakened to are some decisions I made several years ago that seemed insignificant at the time. This has to do with my landscape plans and the large trees I decided to plant. When the trees went in I knew full well how large they could get, how wide they would be, and how and where their deep roots might grow and wander. The thing is I had no plans to be living on this property by the time they became a concern. Well, plans change and here I am, facing the consequences of my former landscape decisions.

In the Science of Mind textbook (p. 388.4) Ernest Holmes writes: “And so we prepare not to die, but to live.” This now is a great reminder about what perspective to have when making decisions of any kind, but especially long-term ones.

Had I made my previous tree-planting decisions with the thought of being the person who would now be trimming, or even eliminating, one large tree (and several smaller ones), I definitely would have made different choices. One of the key influences to my decision-making process is that, up until recent months, I moved homes every two to four years. Sometimes, I moved more often than that. The idea of living in one place long enough to actually watch a tree mature and become a nuisance was entirely foreign to me. Now, it’s rather comforting to imagine that possibility.

I have this vision of growing ancient in this home…of tending gardens and planting perennials… of building sandboxes and playing with many grandchildren on the swing set of our children… of hearing each floor squeak get louder each winter… of crafting from piles of endless stored supplies… of actually sitting on the front deck to watch the sunrise in the summer… and a myriad of other activities as the years float by. With such a vision before me, the decisions I make now are for the long-term. Thus, they are made with greater forethought and consideration than in years past… the way I wished I had made them to begin with when I planted all these trees.

I will make a formal amends to the trees that now must be cut down to stop the damage to my home’s roof and foundation. And I’ve learned to make better choices in every area of my life as a result of this experience… as some decisions are certain to outlive my mortal body. For now, I “…prepare not to die, but to live” a long, healthy and wisdom-filled life.

Anticipation

Posted on by cmryan

This year, more than any other time, I await the results of the presidential election with great anticipation. I’m certainly no expert on all the issues or the candidates. I’m sure there’s much I missed along the way. Yet I paid attention to what was important to me, balanced the presenta­tions from varied sources, did my own research, and then made my decision based on education, intuition and faith. It will be interesting to see how it all turns out.

Anticipation is an interesting sensation. It holds within it increased awareness, enthusiasm and hope… even some attachment to a specific result. This heightened feeling of expectation provides energy to stay alert, fully participating, being involved, and awaiting the finish or at least the completion of the next stage of unfoldment, whether it be election results, health diagnosis, project conclusion, and business or relationship decisions.

As any stage comes to completion, with it can come a sigh of relief and perhaps sadness that it’s finally over. Anticipation’s euphoric breath is released and a thought of celebration usually follows, however brief it may be. Shortly or eventually thereafter, a renewed energy begins to grow to address the next stage, the next idea, or another challenge…and the anticipation cycle begins again.

This cycle of anticipation and closure is very much like what we find throughout Nature. The ebb and flow of the ocean…the growth and rest of the plants from seed to maturity to decay…the changing of the different seasons…day and night… being awake or going to sleep…etc. Thus, this concept is nothing new. Anticipation is a normal way of being and provides us the motivation and energy to pursue our goals and intentions, as well as to carry us through any disappointments toward renewed optimism.

As the election winds down, I release a sigh of gratitude that this event is nearly concluded…until next time. The focus for many people will return to their previous interests, employment efforts, families, friends, homes, and social media postings…other normal ways of being and living. Our country takes a collective sigh of relief as we move forward into the next chapter of our world’s unfoldment and evolution. It’s an exciting time…and one filled with great anticipation!

 

Stay-cation: Plan A or Plan B?

Posted on by cmryan

It’s no surprise to my family how difficult it is for me to take time off. And then there’s the insane process of ‘preparing’ to take time off…what I call “working at pre-vacation speed.” I don’t like catching up; I’d rather be proactive and do as much ahead of time so my return from holiday is at a relatively normal pace (whatever normal is at the time). Thus, by the time vacation comes, I’m truly ready!

My psyche gets a little confused over the whole stay-cation concept though. The idea of staying at home and not really doing anything is so foreign an idea that I’ve had to make some adjustments to the term. I can do day-trips, and then stay here at night, using my home like I would a hotel. I would need to leave very early in the day with a destination planned to encourage my departure. Otherwise, I know what I’ll do…start puttering around, picking up things, fixing projects, sitting down at my computer, etc. Before long, the day is over and I’ve not really experienced the activity I had intended. You can see my dilemma. Obviously the work-aholic issue is alive and present.

With regard to making plans, one tip I received long ago has come in handy in many situations. Make your first activity (Plan A) something you want to do, something you would enjoy and that feels like a worthwhile endeavor. Then also formulate a “Plan B” – an activity of equal or greater interest such that if “Plan A” didn’t work out, you wouldn’t feel at all disappointed. In fact, you might even secretly prefer that “Plan A” failed so you COULD do “Plan B.”

It’s a bit of an insane idea, psyching yourself out of wanting to do the first thing so you can do the second and have more fun, yet still feeling good about failing at the first option not working out to be able to enjoy the second. Make sense? For example, if…

  • “Plan A” is to secretly hide away at home for three days with my husband so we can re­organize my office and finally get it functional and beautiful so I’m happy to be there every day, maybe get done quickly enough that we could do one or two of the things below
  • …or…
  • “Plan B” is (forget the office) just go off on daytrips with my husband, seeing local sights we’ve talked about, doing short hikes and café lunches, visiting places where we’d like to do dedicated retreats, watching a movie during the day or reading a book in the sunshine at a park

…I have some inner conflict between these two options. Each one would be fun for me! Each option leaves me satisfied. But this stay-cation isn’t about just me. The above plans have been discussed with my husband and somewhat laid out. I’m willing to turn over this challenging decision to him and go with the flow, knowing either option will bring happiness to my life. Who would have thought it would be so complicated to want to get away from work?

Won’t it be interesting to see how it all turns out?

Time for Action!

Posted on by cmryan

Have you ever heard of analysis paralysis? It’s when you’re so entrenched in research, analyzing, comparing, judging options, etc. that you can’t make a decision. You don’t think you know enough to do the next correct thing. So you don’t decide on an action step. You just keep collecting information. The thing is, if you make a decision – your best one possible – and then move forward into action, you will actually gain more insight and experience to move forward in your plan, adjusting and adapting as you go along.

I have another one for you to consider: education hesitation. This is similar to the above immobilizing phrase, but in a different sense. It has to do with the beliefthat…if you only had a little more education or went to a few more workshops or took additional retreats or met with a couple more experts/authors…then you would have what it takes to fill the role you say you want. Education hesitation comes from a sense of insecurity that you don’t quite know enough YET to be the person to do the job or start that business. It’s a way to hide out from really interacting with the world–just keep going to school. How do I know this? I used to do it. Thus, I can easily recognize it in those around me.

There’s a colloquial saying that states: “Sh*t or get off the pot.” It means stop avoiding what you say you want to do; make a decision and show some action toward your intended goal. There have been times when I wanted to make that statement to a friend or two…when they tell me of yet ANOTHER class they need to take before they can do whatever. But I’m trying to demonstrate patience and nonjudgment, so I stay quiet. Up until now.

Yes, it’s good to do research…to make an educated decision. Everyone should commit to “due diligence” when making a major change in life. Then, when you’ve discovered all you can, for now, move forward! Have Faith and Trust. Know that you’ll make some mistakes along the way. The truth is you will never know EVERYTHING there is to know about anything. Accept that and act anyway! There will always be something more to learn, one more perspective to consider, one additional piece of information to be found. If you wait until you think you know it all – if you hesitate too long – the opportunity to experience your heart’s desire may be gone before you get to live it. You will actually learn a great deal more by living in the role or situation than just reading about it. I’m a prime example of education hesitation.

Even though I spent numerous years obtaining a bachelor degree and later a masters, while putting in 25 years or so in corporate administrative support, working for high-level executives and gleaning whatever management tips and absorbing words of wisdom they were willing to share…then nearly six years as a church administrator, as well as simultaneously studying to be a minister…nothing is so eye-opening as to actually BE in the senior leadership role I am now blessed to experience…to live and do and be.

All of those prior experiences were invaluable; they helped prepare me – to some degree. Yet, I learn something more EVERY DAY that didn’t come from a research paper or a class or even a former job. Stepping into this role has allowed me to grow intellectually, emotionally, spiritually, in relationship with others, and in ways I never could have imagined. Yes, I make mistakes. I adjust and regroup on occasion. I might even take a step back, move in a different direction, make amends, or read another book. But I keep moving forward and upward in my own evolution. I wouldn’t trade that for all the research documentation in the world!

I rarely give advice to anyone. Today is an exception: Get off the pot! Don’t let education hesitation keep you from becoming the fullest expression your soul came here to be. Start living the dream you claim is yours!

 

Catch-Up…or Not

Posted on by cmryan

Ever since we moved back to our family home earlier this year, there has been a line of boxes waiting to be emptied. One room after another, items have been put away, given away, or tossed away. The artwork is finally going up on the walls. The heavier drapes are being hung in time for the cool nights of autumn. Life’s activities continue one day after the other amidst a stack of this or pile of that. Still, some boxes remain, with contents patiently awaiting a return to usefulness or the trash bin.

Occasionally I declare that it would only take a few days to “catch up” with all of it and things would be back to normal…that I would no longer need to look at these cardboard containers stacked around my office. When I tried that approach – taking a couple of days to unpack files into drawers, books unto shelves, and knick-knacks into corners – the other part of my life fell into panic…the deadlines and projects that I needed to pay attention to came due with amazing speed and stress. I traded one irritation for another.

The truth is, this IS normal…for as long as I can remember. There have always been boxes sitting around in some corner, filled with memories…numerous photograph albums, school papers, childhood gifts, and tidbits from relationships. Throwing these things away seems sacrilegious – all are parts of me. But every once in awhile, when we move or I need to get to something in the far back corner under the bottom of the pile, I’ll look through a box and determine that at least SOME item is no longer necessary to whom I’ve become. I’ll toss it into the wastebasket or ask one of my adult children if they want it. They never do. Why would they?

Frankly, I’ve come to accept that there is no “catch up” either. Time is time. We can’t save it up to use it later. We can only spend it as we live each day…fixing meals, working, hanging pictures, creating art or crafts, playing with grandchildren, working, visiting with friends, sleeping, driving, cleaning, recreation, working, studying, reading, writing, working, etc. (If you’ve followed this blog, you already know that, for me, working is a priority.) But sometimes I can empty a box or two.

I think the reason I resist the boxes is because of their contents. I want to explore each container indepth…look at each piece of paper to determine its value…fondly remember the goings on in my life at the time the item was gifted to me and by whom…make sure I throw nothing away that I’ll regret  later for having done so. No one can really assist me in this process. It’s a solitary endeavor. I’m the only one who can decide what stays and what goes…or how important that piece of paper is to my current existence. For example, reviewing the several small boxes of greeting cards received for all those special occasions during the past few decades from my loved ones. My husband has his own collection, too. We finally agreed that maybe it would be okay to reduce our “collections” and keep only a few of the most precious of these cards…when we have the time to look at them.

I know, eventually, all this will get sorted out. I’d just like to do it while I’m the one still making the decisions and so my children don’t get stuck with it. However, it’s not ALL going to happen today. And for now, I’m okay with that.

Many Hats…One Design

Posted on by cmryan

During a recent prayer session with a practitioner student, I was gifted with clarity into a behavioral habit I’ve developed rather consciously over the past couple of decades. I’m happy to say that the inspiration from that session included a resolution to make significant changes…to create and live a new way of being.

My approach to life has always been to have a backup plan. In this way, I have a “back door” escape, just in case the idea fails, plans don’t work out, or people let me down. What this has done, however, is to keep me from FULLY engaging in life. I participate, but only at a surface level. Sometimes it even allows me to hide out from life. Since I’m not totally engaged, there’s less chance of getting hurt, feeling failure, or even taking full responsibility – good or bad – for whatever the results might be. This approach, I reasoned, protected my heart and feelings from pain and disappointment of my own shortcomings or those of other people involved. Fortunately, I’m not operating from this perspective any longer.

The other related behavior, and which I have become very good at carrying out, is “changing hats.” I can speak to one person about marketing projects and deadlines, another about financial administration or team communication, another about massage and wellness tips, and still someone else about options to their spiritual path. In each case, I would put on “my hat” for each appropriate role (marketing professional, business manager, massage therapist, or minister and teacher, respectively), and then spoke from that perspective. I began to notice that my voice tone changed depending on which “hat” I was wearing or what needed to be addressed. I projected different personas. Many of us do this; there’s nothing really wrong with this communication technique. It’s just not the way I choose to express who I am any longer.

The truth is, I have all these capabilities bundled up inside this one magnificent being of spirit, brain and body – known as me. I’ve lived long enough to accumulate academic education, worldly knowledge, and wisdom from life experiences that give me some expertise in certain matters.  What I don’t know about something I can learn or rely on experts to advise me. I know that I don’t know all there is to know – and I’m okay with that.

The change I’m making – and what I’ve recently been inspired to do through powerful prayer and meditation practices – is to come from Source in all situations…to lead with the heart, with love. This means coming from my authentic, spiritual, heart-centered, compassionate, and strong nature God-self. I have all the Power of God available to my every thought and prayer, as much as I’m willing to accept. I trust with absolute certainty that the life I’m living is filled with Good and Love, no matter how it might look in the moment. I know the person I’m becoming will continue to evolve through all eternity, in one form or another. The only way I can hurt is if I let outside circumstances dominate and control my thinking.

A change of hats is no longer necessary. There is no need for a backup plan. I AM the plan.

Getting Satisfaction

Posted on by cmryan

I love working with my hands. Always have. It allows me to express artistically and it doesn’t matter the project. I can find satisfaction in any form and endeavor.

I enjoy the physical demands of gardening and transforming a landscape with my ideas and suitable plants. I’m in absolute bliss by the smell of fresh cut wood and sawdust. I’m delightfully challenged by the intricacy of tile cutting and then grouting them into walls or floors. I can spend hours in the store touching fabrics, selecting patterns, and then creating fashion and home décor projects. My latest hand-oriented interests include stringing beads into jewelry and fashion, decluttering, organizing, installing shelves, and eliminating life’s excess possessions, as well as lots of writing and computer work. As each project is completed, new inspirations take their place. Every one brings its own level of satisfaction and growth.

Levels of satisfaction vary in their intensity. It could be as subtle as an approving glance and a smile as you walk through your freshly-painted room. It may be sitting at the edge of a weed-free flower bed as you breathe in the wet dirt and the scent of freshly mowed grass. Perhaps you stack, re-sort and re-organize (over several hours) the garage contents on newly installed shelves, to visualize all the possible arrangements. Other displays of personal satisfaction and contentment range from fluffing pillows a dozen times in a newly decorated room… to pushing the computer’s ENTER key when an article is ready for publication… to supporting a friend through a tough challenge… to dragging a family member into a room to look at your latest organizational endeavor.

Whether you have a desire to tackle mountainous goals in business… live in service to others…  create artistic forms…  or learn how to simply be still in the silence for five minutes…  it can happen – one step at a time. Yes, you CAN get satisfaction from the simplest things in life to the most challenging. And it looks different to each of us.

I believe satisfaction, true contentment, is simply feeling peaceful, knowing you gave it your best effort in this particular time and place with all the skills you have right now. It’s becoming your fullest and best YOU in each moment. It’s that quiet happiness that wells up from deep within and just fills your entire being from the inside out. Your mind and body radiate with light and love – the love of God in expression as you with all your talents and creativity, all your mistakes and corrections, all your confidences and insecurities. This unlimited Divine Love doesn’t judge and It never ends. It is complete within Itself…gentle and supportive, encouraging and uplifting. God requires nothing from you…ever.

I love working with my hands and the peace it brings to my life. It allows me to witness my spiritual growth in an outward manner. I get to become Love…and connect with God in a very personal way. Sigh. As soon as I hit the ENTER key, I think I’ll just sit here for awhile…and smile.

My name is…and I’m a…

Posted on by cmryan

What do an unkempt yard, garden tools, and a timer have in common? The answer… awareness and inspiration. My time pulling weeds and cleaning up garden debris has brought to the forefront of my awareness an obvious addiction I’ve had for years…perhaps my entire adult life. It’s one that is often welcomed in the professional arena. But before my friends and congregants get too concerned about my problem, let me declare it here and now: I’m a workaholic…on the path to recovery.

During the past two years, I’ve focused on two separate careers. Long hours and extensive commuting have been the priority, excluding me from any kind of real life. Now, having left the distant, full-time office job and turning full-time focus to ministry, teaching and writing while working from home, I’m discovering the challenges of creating my day’s schedule, learning to rest without becoming complacent or distracted (staying motivated), and quieting the voice in my head that constantly tells me I’m not doing enough.

Just recently, I literally forced myself to spend an afternoon on the couch, resting after a busy Sunday morning and watching television with my husband. There was work waiting at my desk (there always is) and projects were clearly visible around the house, in the yard, garage, and especially in my office. The whole time I was on the couch, that ugly voice was whispering how lazy I was….that I wasn’t really tired and didn’t need to sit there…that work – any work – was more important than television (no matter what was on)…that I’d pay for it later…and other things that were much more critical and hurtful. Ego will say whatever it can to keep things static, familiar. It was all I could do to force my restless body to stay seated in the recliner.

I have always known how to work. I learned it at an early age and have been rewarded for my efforts. It’s what I do best. Frankly, resting, taking breaks, or relaxing is where the difficulty lies. Take away my opportunity to work on a project, to solve a problem, to meet a deadline, and it’s like taking away the bottle from an alcoholic or drugs from an addict. In the past, given a choice to work or go to some social event, I’d gladly choose work (in my head). Most always I have two or three or more projects going at the same time. My brain never shuts off and is generally focused on work-related topics. I learned I could rest when the work is done, but it never is. I’d start a 12-Step group in my area, but taking on another task would only add to the problem. (Go to Workaholics-Anonymous.org for symptoms of this addiction.)

As I work on my landscape maintenance projects, something I absolutely love doing, it’s become critical for my health to pace myself. I use a timer…and the “power of an hour.” I give myself one hour each morning to play in the dirt – that’s it. Then I consciously talk myself into cleaning up, putting away the garden tools, bagging up the weeds and yard trash, before going on to the next task (it’s quite a conversation!)…where I set the timer again. If I don’t limit my time in this manner, I have been known to work myself into exhaustion – euphoric with what I’ve visibly accomplished, but unable to move a muscle from all the adrenal push and exhaustion. My body needs the physical exercise and movement, but I don’t need to work myself to death. Yes, it appears I’ve reached bottom.

My ego had been fairly quiet these past two years as I pushed myself through an insane schedule and rationalized it was something I had to do. Now, it’s shouting again. Making the choice to focus on one career and a personal life has not been an easy one for me. I’m seeing me in a glaring light of self-awareness. I’m noticing the difficulty in pacing myself through projects, finding balance on a daily basis, and committing to recovery from this obsessive, addictive behavior. I’ve even begun to set the timer for my rest periods or fun activities, too, so I know when I can get back to work. Baby steps…one day at a time.

I’m ready to enjoy life – every bit of it – family, friends, home, hobbies, fun and relation, time for me, and work – each in its own turn. I’m grateful for all the loving support in this recovery endeavor. It’ll be interest­ing to see who I become through the process. I could go on and on about this, but right now, I’m being called outside to give a six-year-old lessons in tree climbing. See you later.

CHARACTER

Posted on by cmryan

One of the aspects of our family home, the one we’ve moved back into in recent months, is that – as one friend commented – it has character. Yes, it does. It has unique attributes that give it its own personality and atmosphere, similar to the way people have theirs. It got me wondering, “How does this happen to a house? How do we recognize when a person has character? What does that really mean?”

A few definitions for “character” include: personality, disposition, moral fiber, nature, spirit, and more. When applied to a house, it must come from its architects and, eventually, its residents. We can witness over time how a homeowner or family adds to the personality of a house through its décor, landscaping, and wear-and-tear – the livingness of life. The nicks and bruises, repairs and improvements, even the human or animal scents of those who live there, all modify the original structure. Modifications can be the result of a family’s growth, such as changing a paint color of a room to indicate a boy or girl occupies that space, adding an addition or remodeling a basement as individual interests expand. The space becomes personalized and takes on features that are connected to its occupants and their life events.

This happens to us as well. Our physical development as humans begins in the womb, before we even enter this outer world. We’re born into a family or situation that begins to mold the person we can become – through traditions, rituals, customs, rules, etc. We begin to engage in the shared world, go to schools, join activities, groups and churches, make friends and adversaries, get jobs, and have all sorts of relationships. Every interaction and experience impacts us in some way…it just does.

You may not remember every single thing in detail, but your participation is forever logged in your being, whether physically, mentally or spiritually. It shapes the person you become – and you are always becoming more of who you are capable of being. This “what” – this beingness of you­ – is your character. Just like a home – the nicks and bruises of life, the self-improvements and growth opportunities, the mental expansion that experiences naturally provide – your personality, nature, and spirit are impacted. These factors and more shape the person you are and how you respond to the world and all its interactions of life.

Your character is your way of being in the world, how you think about it, and your part in it. It’s the way you react or respond… judge or accept… blame or take responsibility… avoid or participate… reject or choose. While aspects of character, such as honesty, integrity, ethics, etc., are shared by all, each person’s interpretation of those aspects is what makes their character unique to them. I learned a quotation decades ago that has served me well: “The true character of a man is what he does when no one is looking.” (This applies to women, too.)

A house becomes a home…a baby becomes an adult. Every transformation may include pain and hard work. The final result depends on the effort made throughout the process and the quality of mind put into the creation. As long as you are breathing, you will never be finished creating the person you can become and the character you hold within. And isn’t that a wonderful thing!

AAA+

Posted on by cmryan

The title above is not an endorsement for a towing service or an insurance company. It stands today for “Awareness, Acknowledgment, Action. Appreciation.” It is my simple system of up-leveling life and staying in a positive frame of mind, no matter what is going on around you. This “triple-A+” approach is a quick reminder to me of how to stay centered in the affirmative and to keep growing consciously in life.

Awareness. If you don’t pay attention, you won’t know what’s wrong or right in your life and the world around you. Sometimes we need a “wake up call” or to “hit bottom” before our eyes are opened to reality – the “what is” of life without all our subconscious filters distorting the view. For example, we may become aware of a certain limitation (physical, mental, emotional, financial, etc.) that keeps us from pursuing some particular goal or dream. We can either accept that limitation and halt our plans or we can work on changing the limitation to a strength. Being aware is the first step.

Acknowledgment. This part of the formula requires that we are rigorously honest with ourselves. Frankly, if we can’t be truly honest with ourselves, how can we ever be honest with anyone else? I’ve been working on my knowledge and practices in regard to the way I handle my finances. Through my personal studies, I’ve learned that, for many adult years, I spent any extra cash (and often credit) in the same manner I learned in childhood. Only I can make the change and there’s no one else to blame for the financial position in which I place myself. I am responsible. Going along with my husband on a deal that doesn’t really feel good to me…or trying to convince him to agree with one of my unnecessary remodeling projects…involves taking a hard look at MY part in the process. There are always consequences – positive or negative – cause and effect – for every decision.

Action. Once I’m aware of my pursuit or challenge and acknowledge what part I play in the process, then it’s time to take action. This means I actually DO something about it! I don’t just sit back and complain how unfair life is or blame another because it’s not as easy as it “should be.” Stop “should-ing” on yourself. Making a “To Do” list, remodeling blueprint or financial plan is an action step. Saving 10 cents of every dollar for retire­ment is an action step. Weeding one section of the garden each day is an action step. Do what you can with what you have to work with. Procrastination gets you nowhere.

Appreciation.  Step back and appreciate how far you’ve come…this day, this week, this year or even this decade. My husband and I recently took a quick journey down memory lane and recapped what we’ve accomplished in the past 20 years of our lives. (We’ve been together 17 of them.) It was an amazing realization! If we do that much in the next 20 – holy moly! Actually, we’ll probably do more. Through this review, we came to appreciate each other and our individual selves for the personal growth and accomplishments we have each contributed to our marriage and partnership. The whole is so much greater than the parts, yet the parts are what make the whole!

The “AAA+” approach keeps me on-track toward creating a life I love and can share with others. Use this process, tweak it as you choose. The only way you can lose in the game of Life, is if you don’t play. Never quit! Don’t give up. Keep moving forward. If you’re breathing and thinking, then there’s something you can do. Keep growing.